Dorothy had it right - there’s no place like home. My last day at the office was so nice, we celebrated my last day with a pie - and it was so thoughtful. I’m going to miss them even though it’s only been a summer. I liked having something to do every day, a place to go. But it is so nice to be home. Of course moving out was a pain - I pushed a cart all the way across two avenues and down a block to bring my boxes to the UPS store to get them shipped home. The guy was so very nice, as I was all by myself trying to get it done. It was backed up in there, too. The cart, I might add, was enormous. I was able to fit three boxes, my big suitcase, my rollerboard, my briefcase, and my purse - and there was still plenty of room to spare. Of course, I could have just done it the easy way and used a cab, but for whatever reason I just felt better doing it this way. I felt kinda strange about it going there - what a pain it was. But on the way back, I was met with a fellow cart-pusher, and didn’t feel so crazy. Of course, when I passed two more I figured I’d started a trend. ; )
The use of flight as a method for travel has become incredibly obnoxious and inconvenient. Obnoxious because there’s always at least one crying baby or child on a plane. There’s nothing you can do to cope with that - especially if you’re sitting next to him or her. And the rest of us in the back of the plane can’t really escape it either, but it’s just a little less loud.
And you can never count on a flight to leave on time and arrive on time. It just doesn’t happen. I have yet to go on a flight in the past year that has been on time. I have come to hate flying, but it’s a necessary part of my life and as part of my job. The worst part is that despite the fact that these flights are almost always delayed, it does not mean that you can arrive later at the airport - and if you arrive after they have boarded you have no chance of getting on it - despite the fact the flight’s delayed anyway. Something has to be regulated! It’s driving consumers crazy! The price of flights, the unreliability of flights, and the general comfort of them has made flying so unenjoyable.
Now that I’m over that, I’m so happy to be back. I was greeted by my lovely mother and father at the gate, it was such a surprise! It really made my night. Of course I was prepared to battle politics with my father and discuss the current state of affairs at my house with my mother. My cousins were in town - and their best friend couple. There’s no place like home. I like going out and exploring the world, but it sure is nice to have the love and support of your family. We went saw “Must Love Dogs” with Diane Lane and John Cusack. They didn’t have too much chemistry and well the movie just didn’t seem like it had much substance - though a lot of the lines from it were hilarious. More than anything, it reminded me of Napoleon.
My cousins have left - and now I will be living in my twin’s room as my Grandmother is sick and living with us. But I like having a house full of people and full of life. My little sister has adopted a “friend” and she is living with us. And of course my brother - the trouble maker - always telling it how it really is. And dunking me in the water while he’s at it. I’ve also been dying to see Caramel - my best guy friend - and an Indian who should have been born a white southern boy. He even calls himself white. Ah, such is life. He came to the beach with us today, it was so great seeing him again.
Here I am now, sitting on my porch, with my dog by my side, and the cat bugging the daylights out of him AND me. He’s been doing pretty poorly. He hovers outside by the door, and the porch is littered with spots of blood, where he anticipates someone to either come out and pet him or let him inside. He still managed a little grin when he saw me, and wagged his tail enough to compensate for the rest of the grin. I wash his mouth out every day - and try to feed him twice as much. But he’s still losing weight, and there’s nothing I can do. Cancer makes you feel so helpless.
The cancer has mutilated his nose and distorted his mouth. He’s nearing his end. The vet said we would know when is when. That you come to a point when you realize that he’s gone, and only suffering. He’s suffering but not in the physical sense - more in the sense that he can’t do many of the things he could and was allowed to do, like being inside. So he just stays by the door, wagging his tail, hoping against hope to be let in. His greatest love is to be with people, and to be by their side - a loyal best friend.
Since things have changed, and he has to stay outside, I make it a point to stay outside, too. He doesn’t mind being outside so much when I’m outside with him. I bring my laptop or a good book out on the blood spattered porch and we sit and watch the river. He bugs me every once in a while to get a pet on the head. I wonder am I in heaven here or am I in hell at the crossroads I am standing… I love the light that brings a smile across his face.
I found out the pizza man who comes here on a regular basis fixed him a doggie bone out of pizza dough. What a kind heart - I know that Napoleon really enjoyed it. When I found out, I just started crying - the kind of tears that come when you’re not expecting it. He’s sleeping so peacefully, I just hope he feels that way.
